The importance of community in mental health and recovery

Introduction

Connection is vital for a positive human experience. It even transcends beyond humanity: many other species in this realm also rely on communal efforts to realize their purpose while they’re here.

When you’re in a state of suffering — whether it be in active addiction, a mental or physical health problem, stuck in a negative feedback loop, etc. — it becomes a challenge to connect to a group that can bridge the gap from where we are to where we aspire to be.

The good news is that, with a little self-reflection and patience, it’s becoming easier to identify and find communities where you can grow and flourish. In this article, we’ll take a look at how to identify and find your soul tribe, how to nourish your budding relationships, and what to do if you’re actively in a spiral of perceived negativity such as an addiction or health issue.

Onward!

Patience along your journey to community

We all want to be understood and have confidants to go to when we’re having a problem. Sometimes, the people we spend time with are inadvertently contributing to the problem we’re trying to solve. It’s likely unintentional, and we shouldn’t hold resentments towards them for it. We should do our best to be kind towards them and forgive them for any perceived sleight. Still, it can become a challenge to cultivate patience when trying to connect with those who can help us with our problem. The internet helps alleviate this problem, but there’s something to be said about face-to-face interaction that the internet can’t replicate.

Perhaps you’re an introvert and you don’t require much social interaction. That’s how I am, too (well, since the pandemic). That doesn’t mean we should shut people out, burn bridges, or turn down an opportunity to meet someone new just because we identify as an introvert. Sometimes, the person we least expect to become a member of our soul tribe ends up being just the person the Lord sent to us to help us with our perceived problems.

If you’re at the stage where you’re hoping to find the right helping hand and don’t feel like you can go it alone, sometimes what’s required is patience and commitment. The scientific method has revolutionized our lives, and one of its key principals is experimentation. Attend a variety of different meeting bodies, types, and locations. Have an idea of the sort of community you’re looking for, but be flexible when comparing the idea in your head versus the reality of the people you’re meeting. Especially in active addiction, our idealized version of reality can become far removed from what this realm is actually like.

For some people, this stage is natural. For others, it can take some time before they find a group that they gel with. Transitioning from one stage of your life to another requires a lot of time, energy, and commitment. “Rome wasn’t built in a day”. The point is to persevere in your efforts until something sticks. This leads us to our next topic: community building and socialization is a skill that takes practice.

Socialization as a skill

Before you can run, you have to walk. Before you can walk, you have to crawl. Skills that seem natural to us in adulthood are the product of gradually compounding and building from previously learned skills.

This is the same for growing with your soul tribe. Before you can flourish with nourishing, enriching, and mutually beneficial connections, first you have to realize that a healthy community is important. Then you have to brainstorm about the sort of community you’re looking for. Then you have to attract those connections, one by one. It’s a form of step work.

For some, this is a natural skill. The extroverts, the socialites, the influencers. For some, it is a skill they have to work on. Regardless, it’s a skill that has to be continually refined in order to stay sharp.

The pandemic changed many things regarding our existence, and connecting to our community is a major one. It gave us time to reflect on what we truly value and want to be remembered for. On the flip side, it also scarred communication for many of us. Allow this to be a reminder that you’re okay and worthy just as you are; your story is still being written.

The task of finding your soul tribe can seem daunting for someone who doesn’t even know what that looks like. Instead of focusing on the 180-degree shift that you ultimately are looking for, consider the gradual actions you can take in the moment to make your dreams a reality. Remember, many communities are out there eagerly looking for someone just like you.

Being open minded to other’s suggestions

We change and grow everyday. Paraphrasing my sponsor, sometimes another person says something that was inspired by your guides that you need to hear.

It does require balance. We are all worthy and deserving of connection just by the fact that we share one big family: the human race. It’s wise to practice discernment with who you let in to your inner circle, because not everyone has the best intentions for you and your loved ones. But, you also can’t allow past wounds to block you from living in the present moment and enjoying where you’re currently at. Be hopeful for good things yet to arrive, but be thankful for the good things that you’ve currently been blessed with.

If you’re currently attempting to break free from a cycle of negativity, it can be a challenge to connect with others. They say the opposite of addiction is not abstinence, but rather connection. Start with baby steps, if not a crawl. Join some Facebook groups, attend a meeting either in-person or online, or even do a guided meditation. The point is to change your habits until you become someone who isn’t on the same frequency as someone in a negative feedback loop. As always, if you have breath in your lungs your story isn’t over yet. Good luck!

Conclusion

May you find True inner peace and joy in your own divine timing. It’s not something I can give, but it can be found if you just keep going.

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